Tuesday, October 29, 2013

The Well-Trained Muslim Child: Raising Children in Light of the Qur'aan & Sunnah Part 1


All praise and thanks belongs to Allaah. Lord and Creator of all the worlds. May Allaah bestow His peace & mercy upon the Prophet, his family, his companions, and on all of those who follow them in truth until The Last Day. Aameen

As salaamu alaykunna,

Today for our theme we are coming from the book "Raising Children in light of the Qur'aan & Sunnah" by 'Abdus-Salaambin 'Abdillaah As-Sulaymaan with an Introduction by Shaikh Saalih Al-Fawzaan Al-Hamdulillaah.

"Accustoming the Child to have Good Manners and a Righteous Character:"

After weaning, the child enters a stage where he is distinguished for having a pure and clean disposition as well as a love for following and imitating. So he is like a soft piece of dough (ready to be molded). Therefore, you must not belittle this stage in their lives and say: "He is young - he doesn't understand!"

"Etiquette's benefit children when they are still young. But when they are older, they are of no benefit to them. Verily, if you try to straighten up a small twig, you can do so. But as for a full-grown tree, you will not be able to mold it. No matter how hard you try."

So you must familiarize him with the etiquettes of eating, sleeping and greeting. And make him become accustomed to receiving and giving with his right hand as well as to say Al Hamdulillaah when he sneezes and YarhamukAllaah when someone else sneezes. He should also be made to get used to the characteristics of honesty and trustworthiness. 

"Umar bin Abee Salamah said: "I was a young boy under the care of Allaah's Messenger (sallaahu 'alayhi wa sallaam) and my hand would go around the dish when eating. So the Messenger of Allaah (sallaahu 'alayhi wa sallaam) told me: 'O young lad, mention the name of Allaah, eat with your right hand, and eat (from the dish) what is closest to you." Ever since then  applied these instructions when eating."

The child should also be discouraged from evil characteristics such as lying, selfishness and jealousy for one's brothers.

From the things that are binding upon the parents is that they warn their child about the forbidden as the Prophet, warned Al-Hasan from eating out of the charity since he was a member of the Prophet's household and it was not lawful for them to consume charity. 

Abu Hurairah reported: "Al-Hasan once took a date from the stockpiles of charity and placed it in his mouth. So the Prophet said: "Kakh, Kakh! Throw it away, throw it away. Don't you know that we don't eat from charity?"

'Abdullaah bin Mas'ood reported that he once saw one of his sons wearing a garment made out of silk, so he ripped it and said to him: "This is only for women."

So it is an obligation on the parents to prevent their child from things that are prohibited even if their child is at the age where he is not accountable for his actions. This is since if he is accustomed to doing the unlawful in his youth, he will become attached to it when he gets older and it will be hard for him to stop at that point.

The mother should accustom her daughter to observe modesty and to keep away from the presence of male-strangers as well as to wear clothes that properly cover (her body) and to refrain from wearing short garments, which many Muslims are being tested with today.

The Well-Trained Muslim Child: Playing and having fun with the child (next week In shaa Allaah)

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