I love writing about being a homemaker. And its important to remember that everyone can be a homemaker, but not everyone is a Muslimah Homemaker :-). So this is a series on the blog simply called: Muslimah Homemaker, where I share tips, thoughts, and various aspects of homemaking with an Islaamic foundation. Because Islaam covers every aspect of life and Allaah has made this deen perfect!
A quality that a Muslimah Homemaker should have is that she works with her willingness and her ability on the job.
People normally work according to their willingness and not to their ability.
Willingness meaning their desire. But if you lack the desire, then how is your work ethic?
If you lack willingness and only work using your ability.......then where is the joy or desire?
If you work using your ability then this means you work using your capability, or power.
I believe you should work in homemaking using both. If you find that you are missing one of the two then start trying to figure out the root of the problem. Al Hamdulillaah instead of me sharing my own thoughts, I was blessed today to have my husband weigh in.
One of the things you can do to gain the two: The willingness and the ability is to remember Allaah's laws over you and the purpose for Him creating you and your connection to a man.
The purpose for marriage, the purpose for populating the earth, and your dealings with your spouse its all connected to your ability and willingness to be a good homemaker.
For example, if you go out into the work place, or out into the market, and you see someone attractive that catches your eye, and you look twice at them. And then you hurry to see if they are in the next aisle and then you look again. You might not say anything to the person nor try to catch eye contact, its just something that propelled you to look at this person again or hope he is at the cash register when you get there. YOU NEED TO FEAR ALLAAH!!!!!! when you look down, as you been commanded you don't know how good another brother really looks, you don't know how other people look. The only man you see is your husband! He's all you got. And when you have it that way, you will work on that house only, because that's all you got, and that's the only man you have.
The commandment to lower your gaze has been neglected. It has been neglected! It is directly connected to your ability and willingness to be what Allaah has commanded the Muslimeen to be. One might not think that its directly connected, until one goes home and see their husband sitting on the sofa, hair not cut, still in house clothes, can you see how you don't want to do anything for this person or for that house?
When you compare what you have at home and what you believed you would have gained from the person in the store, it stops you from creating the environment in which this person at home needs to be better. When you keep a clean house, you keep an Islaamic environment in the house, you are a happy person because you are in love with what Allaah has ordered you. This environment (i.e. a husband) does not allow a person to sit and do nothing. He may not gain a job, if he is jobless but it may propel him to read Qur'aan, to study, to go to the Masjid and by Allaah you might not even have to remind him, your environment is so important, don't do it for him, do it because you are a part of the Ummah of Muhammad (sallaahu alayhi wa sallaam) where we correct society by correcting ourselves and correcting our houses. Allaahu Akbar!
It seems as if the guy in the market was something better. Something that you had to move to, or get to in 2017 to move forward. In this case your willingness is lost because of what the Shaitan put before you and you choose not to be able (or have the ability) to honor your house. To clean that house, to take care of your husband and his property whether he is working or not, its lost.
Another example, if you go to a 5 star hotel and they offer you every single thing that you need before you even ask for it because they have a manual for customer care or hospitality. The environment caters to you, what type of person would you be in this type of environment? Whether you are not happy at first, imagine how the good treatment would change your behavior, the kind words, nice speech, 'Do you need anything else ma'am/sir?' 'How may I help you?'
If you go to a motel, which doesn't even have a ranking, towels are slightly soiled, the bed sheets have cigarette burns in it, the once plush carpet is now like a flat wooden floor from grease and dirt, and traffic. The lamp has stains on it, where you don't even want to touch it to turn it on. Can you imagine the person who lives in this environment?
The dishes in the sink is like this motel. The clothes on the floor is like this floor of the motel. Your late meals that you serve is like the customer care at this place. Your lack of concern about how he's doing is just like this motel.
To get the willingness start small. Give the greeting upon entering and make a commitment to yourself, that you will ask your spouse 3 times a day, 'May I help you, or help you with something?' with the voice and concern of a 5 star hotel.
Homemaker, Wife, Mother, Blogger, Planner Enthusiast and Self Care Advocate